Success is to be the best you

 Success is to be the best American writer William
your own. Faulkner said: br> Chinese society has a common problem, it is hoped that everyone according to a model developed to measure whether each person people bear the brunt of the pursuit of wealth, all walks of life, the success of the evaluation of a person, more personal wealth as an indicator. But with the best results you will be able to contribute to society? have fame and fortune to some be happy?
true success should be diversified. success may be that you have created new wealth or technology, may be brought happiness for others you may be on the job you get the trust of others may also find the back of your self, inoffensive way of life. The success of each person is unique. So, Ling Zhijun in its your own. successful first step: take aim in life, be a proactive person
Sina chat room, when friends ask what my goal in life, I was so answered: is to have the greatest influence (impact), to help themselves, help families, help the country to help the world and help future generations, allowing them to enjoy better, more efficient, can bring them happiness and Happy. but my best think-tank, it has helped me many times to solve the problem of work and life. I had to give up work in the United States and moved to China was founded Microsoft Research China, it is because I feel better after a work great influence, and my goal in life is more consistent. In addition, when I received a letter from the students lost letters, write them a letter, I would think: . He said: I was wrong. In fact, the meaning of life is that there really is. ? so, he may not go astray by.
so, whether to the truth, in order to influence, or for pleasure, family, morality, tranquility, knowledge, innovation hh Once the goals in life, you can goal in life, like me, under the guidance and decisively to make major life decisions. each person's life goals are unique. The most important thing is, you have to take the initiative to take their own life goals. But do not be rushed, not to the pursuit of so-called answer, because only one person can tell what your goal in life, that person is you. only one place you can find your target, that is your heart.
I suggest you close your eyes, the first emerging the ideal in your head record, because the answer without thinking is the most sincere. Or, you can look back at your happiest, most rewarding of life is, is there something in common? they are may be the most inspired your life goal. Furthermore, you can imagine, fifteen years later, when you reach the perfect state of life, what kind of environment you will be in? what kind of work? one of the most What a happy thing? Of course, you may wish to talk about family and friends, listen to their views.
successful second step: to try new areas to explore your interests in order to become the best you
themselves, the most important thing is to play to their full potential, pursue the most interesting and the most passionate thing. When you are interested in a certain area, you will walk to class or taking a bath when they never forget it, you The success of the field more easily. Furthermore, if you have passion in this area, you may neither eat nor sleep for it, even when you think of an idea to sleep, will jump. this time, you have not for success, while the is to talent to do it well, you definitely do not release all of the potential. So I do not agree with every student to pursue the most popular professional, I believe that everyone should understand their interests, passion and ability (that is, EQ in the call progress to human development and improvement of life and excitement. mathematics. If he left school at Harvard to continue reading and become a professor of mathematics, can you imagine his potential will be suppressed and to what degree? 2002, Bill. Gates, Microsoft's 25 years in leadership, but decided to Chief executive's job to Ballmer, because the only way he can join in the work of his favorite mm as chief software architect, specializing in software technology innovation. Although the Bill. Gates was a good CEO , but when he he was named chief software architect, his direction of the company made a significant contribution to technology and, more importantly, he is more passion, more happiness, and which also inspired the morale of all employees.
Bill. a good friend of Gates, America's most outstanding investors, Warren. Buffett also recognized the importance of passion. When a student asked him the direction, he always would reply: . If you have to find a difference, it may be an opportunity to do my daily work I love. If you want me to give you advice, this is the best advice I can give you out. . Gates and Warren. Warren Buffett, another revelation to us is that they love is not vulgar, unified fame and fortune, their fame is their vision and passion can bring. the United States a well-known SEM has conducted a survey and found that while most students want to chase fame and fortune in the admission, but alumni with the most fame and fortune, 90% of the ideal pursuit of admission, rather than chasing fame.
I just entering college, want to engage in legal or political work. a year later I found myself not interested in it, only in the middle grades. but I fell in love with computers, programming a day frantically, quickly attracted teachers, students attention. Finally, one day sophomore year, I made a major decision: to abandon more than a year after the top three in the United States Department of Law at Columbia University has cultivated itself into credits transferred to Columbia University, Department of Computer obscure . I told myself, life only once, should not be wasted in the absence of joy, no sense of accomplishment in the field. at that time a friend said to me, will pay a lot of change in professional costs, but I told them to do a job without passion will pay higher price. That day, I elated spirits, I promise to myself, each subject three years after the University should take the decision of A. If not that day, and today I would not have achieved in the computer field achievement, and I probably just a small town in the United States is neither successful nor happy to be a lawyer.
Even so, the passion of my career and my father is far compared. I have always thought his father was a stern man to see his father's favorite until last year the two students (who are now professors), I know how much my father loved his work. his students told me: grin, he was to make us more like our subjects, often in the discussion of our favorite restaurants. He got to spend our time and money, far more than his meager income. After the army, politics and writing career after finding his favorite mm teaching. He passed away in his drawer to find the students he encouraged his two sentences: hoof. It is easier talented achievements, but do not because they do well to think it is of interest to you. To find the true interest and passion, you can ask yourself: For something, you are eager to repeat it, whether can happily and successfully complete it? you have been longing for the past is not it? is always quick to learn it? it always makes you satisfied? you sincerely from the heart (not just from my mind) love it ? you the happiest thing in life and it is not relevant? When you ask yourself, pay attention not to the expectations of your parents, social values and the influence of friends into your answer.
If you can clear answer these questions, then you are lucky, because most of the students in the university four years in exploration or remorse. If you have yet to find answers to these questions, I have only one suggestion: give yourself the opportunity to reach up to the most choice. I remember I first entered the Carnegie. Mellon Ph.D., the school has a mechanism that allows students pick teachers. in the first month, every teacher to make the body the stops to attract students. It is because of this mechanism I was lucky enough to meet my mentor, Professor Reddy, select the subject of my PhD, , subjects and teachers, and then pick and choose your interest. You can also libraries, networks, seminars, club activities, friends, communication, e-mail and other ways to find hobbies. Only you can try to touch, you can only try to find Your favorite.
Ya-Qin Zhang of my colleagues once said: who did not dare try, is an absolute failure. , set milestones, a step forward
find your interest, the next step is to do the development of specific milestones toward their own ideals Yibubuxiang.
First, you should objectively assess the distance their interests and ideals but also of hearing what? is a need to learn a lesson, read a book, make a more sociable person, control your temper or become a better speaker? fifteen years became the best of their and what their differences today? or otherwise? you should try to fill these gaps. For example, when I decided to make my life purpose is to maximize my influence, I found that my lack of speech and communication capacity. I had a talk to people embarrassing, came fear of speech will be students. I do when TA was especially poor, students and even took me a ideal, I set myself a number of presentation and communication skills to improve the specific objectives.
Second, you should be set phase, the specific objectives, and then give full play to the traditional virtues of Chinese people mm hard, up and perseverance efforts to complete the goal. For example, I demand of myself to do two speeches a month, and every time my classmates or friends to sit, give me feedback. I promise to myself, do not rehearse three times, and never came to power speech. I demand of myself a month to listen to lectures, ask for advice to the excellent speakers. One speaker taught me several ways to overcome fear, he said, if you look at the audience's eyes tight, you can see the audience head, and the audience will still think you look at their faces, in addition, is best not to take the paper and hand grip from the fist to come as a trembling hand to the attention of the audience will not. When I repeated after practice speaking skills , I discovered a lot of tips, such as: no script, through story-telling way to express, I will perform better, so I'm still prepared speech but only when used in rehearsal; I found my ability to answer questions beyond my ability to speak, so I usually stay for the time required to answer questions; I found myself not interested will not be able to speak good things, so I will not promise that I am not interested about the subject. A few years later, around me people Doukua my speech well, some people even think I was born a good speaker, in fact, I just practice hard the Chinese people, up and only the traditional virtues such as perseverance.
any target must be real, measurable goals, not just stay in the ideological slogans or empty talk. The purpose of setting goals is to progress, do not measure you can not know whether they made progress. So, you have to abstract, and can not be implemented, not measured The simplified into practical goals, measurable small goals. For example, a few years ago, I have a goal is to expand my network of people in the company, but force, an influential person who re-introduced to me. ;. The purpose is to expand the network of relationships to make the work more successful, so I will measure the . A year later, I did from these metrics, we see their networks have been significantly expanded.
the development of specific goals must be realistic about their capabilities. goal setting too high of course unrealistic, but the target can not be set too low. on target and timely adjustments to be done: if you exceed their expectations, can expect to improve; If you do not meet their expectations, expectations can be lowered. to reach a goal, you can then develop more challenging goals; fails to embrace that, conscientiously sum up the lessons.
Finally, once again reminded the students, the goal is yours, only you know what he wants. to develop the most appropriate target, take the initiative to upgrade their , and in the promotion process to objectively measure progress, in order to be successful, you can become better.
self-confidence is self confident and not arrogant
who dare to try new areas, the development of faster their interests and talents, more likely to succeed. self-confident people are more happy, because he will not always worry about and guard against failure.
many people think that self-confidence is successful. old was first a student, he had confidence . an employee is always being promoted, he also has confidence. But this is only the success of unified and centralized self-confidence.
fact, confidence is not necessarily a good thing. do not feel confident will be proud, but will lose the others respect and trust. good self-confidence is self-conscious, that is very clear what they can do and can not do. conscious self-confidence, his probability of success is very large; conscious people do not self-confident, he can try, but risk will be frank to tell others. conscious people do not need to enhance self-confidence through success, failure will not result in the loss of self-confidence.
confident first step: Do not underestimate yourself, give yourself pep
Since the I was very inferior. a grass, dew point, 7 converted into decimal equal to a few? will not I am confident. I began to tell myself that I have a math talent. At this time, I especially want to learn English, because the only way to learn more math. this kind of education means not only improved my self-confidence, but also to help me in all areas has made considerable progress.
Chinese-style education that people continue to overcome the shortcomings of the growth process is, so the teacher more in the criticism of students, for students to make up for the worst of the subjects. Although the school should have for each subject was some people are trying to grow up ; to enhance their strengths and manage their own shortcomings things, to gain tremendous self-confidence.
Ling Zhijun Still later in the day, I often than others, but I said to myself: I can do better than others broke the record, to gain self-confidence. He said: continues today. I found the whole secret of genius, in fact, only six words: Do not underestimate yourself. one by proud of what? you get a good result? you help others it? what is beyond your expectations? who praise you? I believe everyone can find a successful day, the things you will gradually find that these most proud of the game and an action (such as the clenched fist) linked so that their time to do this action, they will subconsciously think of pride thing, and then repeated each time to do this action before the game to ; brain, improve self-confidence.
hope that the students can become your own best cheerleaders, and cheer for you, make more friends, more memorable past success, do not underestimate yourself.
the second step of self-confidence : with determination, courage, self-confidence from the success in obtained from increasing failure in the conscious
when you're feeling confident, no matter how small the success, you will particularly look forward to once again be their own or other people's positive, then you need to have enough willpower. as long as you have the stamina, will, like Zhou said, learn to question, but you want to learn. If you have something in his hand a burning desire, you will have a spirit of persistence, especially when you are ordinary people. > Sometimes, you may have not done a thing, do not know can not be made. At this time, in addition to perseverance, but you need courage. I used to work, there is no problem of communication in general, but to the president before, the total did not dare to speak, for fear wrong thing. until one day, to do the restructuring of the company, President convened a meeting more than a dozen people, he asked each person speak in turn. I thought, since some talk about it as the truth be told. So I bravely said: The whole room was silent. After the meeting, many of my colleagues sent me an e-mail said: restructuring of the company's policies, but also often quoted to me. From then on, I am full of confidence, not afraid to speak in front of anybody. This example fully confirmed, words.
the courage to try new things, but also must have the courage to face failure. We can not do it just by Pifuzhiyong something doomed to failure. But when you fear failure, we might think about what you are afraid of losing ? the worst fate that? you can not accept it? In the above example, if the president rejected my view, he will not respect me? not only not others is likely to think that I am ambitious. and conscious people will learn from the failure to recognize that they are not fit to do something, and then upgrade their own initiative. So do not fear failure, as long as you do the force, willing to challenge their own limits, you should own courage and pride.
a confident and conscious, and if they will bravely try new things, and perseverance to do it well, where he will gain confidence from the success from failure in the increase of consciousness.
confidence The third step: consciously set specific objectives, with an open mind to listen to others, develop self-confidence assessment
also set specific goals, step by step forward. These goals must be measurable. I had left my president, spoke before the case told my daughter to listen to, because her teacher thought she was shy to speak in the schools do not raise their hands, and I want to encourage her courage to speak. She agreed to try, but she believed that only at the appropriate time, there only willing to speak the best advice. But I think with the She held a hand every day and if you have one month bonus. Then, we slowly increase the number of hands. A year later, the teacher noticed that she had enough confidence to speak the classroom.
not confident self-paranoid, does not allow my own mistakes, or excessive self-centered, objective position lost. I have a very smart colleagues, look for his life, behave very confident that once a statement that he was right, he will remind everyone a few months ago he would have said that. but because he is almost self-confidence and to live, once a statement that he was wrong , he would say so outright, or simply denied. Although his correct rate of 95%, but 5% of the error so that he lost his credibility and the respect of others. This example tells us proud or unconsciously, self-confidence self-confidence even more dangerous than no self-confidence.
consciously in emotional intelligence has two levels: both for themselves and the environment Jieneng to master the objective and subjective situation. There conscious self-criticism will not unduly , and will not naively optimistic, they can objectively assess their own. Therefore, they will honestly face the limits of their ability, will not easily accept their own ability to work outside. Of course, they are still willing to accept challenges, but will accept the challenge to do an objective risk assessment. such a person not only for their frank and honest to others also. honest people will face the failure of the trust, because they know you accept the lesson. honestly face their shortcomings will be others respect, because they know you will not be presumptuous. Therefore, conscious people tend to be successful, it is easy self-confidence.
conscious people not only fair to yourself, but also the initiative to ask people around to their criticism and feedback. They understand that although he is very conscientious, but others saw themselves as more important. the one hand, others saw themselves more objectively, on the other hand, the eyes of others is the real existence of their own (), that is, if people think you are wrong, only you think you are not wrong, then in social, school or company in the eyes, you're wrong. So, you have an open mind to understand and accept other people's ideas, but also with the ideas of others as the ultimate goal. For example, my daughter can assess their everyday speech, but in the end, only when teachers and students that she was a cheerful, with the idea of a student, she achieved the ultimate goal. < br> get honest feedback, especially negative feedback is not easy. So, you'd better have some brave and honest good friends, and they are willing to speak the truth to you in private. Of course, you can not have any negative feedback dissatisfied, or to hear the truth of your future. In addition to the feedback in private, the company in the United States, there is a . because this survey is anonymous, it tends to get real opinions, and if a lot of people say you still need to improve in certain areas, such allegations or boss than your own views more persuasive. While in school Without this formal investigation, but you can still best way to understand something you think. My father always taught us to seek the things to the public, this means open minded, not to Wells Sky, limits their horizons .
Majiajue said: look down on him and understand why, then self-improvement. frank exchange and a true friend can help Majiajue may prevent tragedy.
conscious people have set realistic goals for themselves, an objective measure of their own, and will ask others to help evaluate. so people can continue to enhance their self-confidence, and confidence to avoid the development of pride.

happiness is more important than the scientific proof of success: a good mood to play the most potential; happy to improve efficiency, creativity and the probability of correct decisions; happy people have an open mind, willing to help others. but not so much happy to bring success, not as good as that is to bring happiness and success achieved. I suggested that students pursue their own ideals and interests, in fact, do their own ideal, are interested in things is a joy. Therefore, success is more than happy should be our ultimate goal.
happy the first step: to accept your parents, the environment, their
is not always a happy thing for some helpless sulk, do not like their parents and teachers do not want to read boring books, do not want to deal with them. For these helpless, and I hope that students can learn to accept them calmly .
at all The idea, I use the general requirements of their values and ideas to work, study, study. so I always avoid them, more and more lonely. First, you should accept your parents, do not because parents do not understand your feelings and self-enclosed. parents to grow in different environments, different ways of thinking, their definition of success may also be different on your expectations and your own hope there is a greater difference. but their way of life You went fairly long, rich experience than you, you can not prejudiced to exclude them. In addition, you must understand that parents are in the world who loves you, they are also CD one can pay for you unconditionally, you should unconditionally accept your parents. for their children parents often over-idealized, and neglect the vast majority of parents in their growth environment, we are more scarce than , less than, they may not have the opportunity to learn how to be a good parents, but their conditions are best. If we despise, reject their parents, we would be disrespectful of their source of life, then how can we happy?
Second, you can try to change to parents, but you should first ask that you understand and accept your parents? you can understand parents thinking? expect when you complain about your parents always perfect, do not you also in the hope that parents perfect? Ling Zhijun suggested that: They, in order to more successfully communicate with them. mutual understanding, perhaps you still have different views but can mutual understanding, perhaps you or they will alter the views and reach a consensus. To do this, you should first establish a frank and parents communication relationship. Perhaps you will feel awkward at first, but I believe you will soon feel the affection and warmth.
addition to receiving a parent, you should also accept the environment can not change things. Some students look forward to not consider them useless topics that do not have the class they think useless, do not listen they do not trust the teacher. but to survive in a society, we must learn to accept things that can not be changed. Ling Zhijun said: r and should be doing the things l like to do the conflict between r, and I will arrange a schedule of their day to complete in the time to do rmm l schedule should inspire you to concentrate and to improve efficiency . then do l like to do r. good enough.
the most pointless motivate themselves, it should also be able to accept yourself, understand your life for themselves. To live is to order their own happiness, interests and life goals, do not live in someone else's values. Microsoft Research Asia Dean Shum child has been living in someone else's values ...